The Family Tree: Revenge of the Three-nager

Well, well, well. Lookie what we have here. An almost 3 year old going on 13. I'm so not ready for the terrible 3's. I've heard that 3 is so much worse than 2. Well...we might almost be there as I sit here at the computer desk, with a child that is throwing me attitude over not wanting to take a nap in the room next door. "I don't wanna take a nap, you understand?!" Yes, that just came soaring out of my son's mouth right before he slammed the door. Yes, you read right. He slammed the door. (I may or may not have slammed the door once or twice during the ugly potty training era) Whoops. So here I sit, with a 'threenager' on my hands, dreading the fact that the napping phase might possibly be over, thus ending my small window of free time. My sanity break. My get-everything-done-that-i-possibly-can-in-an-hour-and-a-half-without-whining-crying-begging-children-crawling-all-over-me time. My watch-anything-other-than-mickey-mouse-clubhouse-or-paw-patrol-without-getting-interupted-five-zillion-times break.

Mom, I take a nap in a second, ok? - Boston just sticks his head out of his door to fill me in on the latest. Yeah right! 5 seconds later, "Mom, I had a good nap. I'm a happy boy." You've got to be kidding me. Ugh. The never ending battles. I need a drink. No, you don't. I want pizza! No, we just ate dinner. I want daddy to tuck me in (Jeff walks over, Boston has a fit) no, I want mom to tuck me in! I want a different 'blanklet'. I give him a different blanket. No, I want my that one blanklet! (The one he had in the first place) I need to go potty. (I take him into the potty, and Boston flips out.) I don't want to go potty! Mom, I want my Jake boat in my room. (I bring his boat down) Mom, I don't want my Jake boat in my room! (I take his jake boat back upstairs) Mom, I want my Jake boat! SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! Someone up there has their feet up, eating popcorn, and cracking up as they watch my life. 'Look, Boston is about to push the last button, check this out!' 'How many plates will she break today?'

He has found out that the longer his prayers are, the more time he has before he goes to bed. Tonight he literally thanked Heavenly Father for every single piece of clothing he owns. Thank you for dat one dinosaur shirt, and for my blue shirt got messy yesterday, and for my Mickey Mouse shirt, and for dat one train shirt, and for my pa-choo (paw patrol) Jammie's, and my hipball (football) Jammie's, and for santa Jammie's, and my Boston hat, and my puppy dog hat etc, etc, ETC! Squeeze-it Grandma and Fishy Grandma are mentioned at least 3 times each, as well as Papa, Grandpa, mommy, daddy, Ellie and Boston, and after that list he ends with 'thank you for everybody,' to make sure he doesn't leave anyone out. The other night we were laughing pretty hard when he said 'thank you for dat one castle guy, I cannot find him. He is hiding.' Another time, he had started his prayer, but kept getting distracted asking for water and other things. Jeff started counting, and after he said 'one,' Boston said 'thank you for one,' and we all busted up laughing. So now, every prayer he is thankful for 'one.' He also takes it down to the basics. Thank you for the table, and that wall, and dat one door, for my chair, for my plate, and my spoon, and that one yellow fork, and my cup......Seriously. Five minutes pass and the food is getting cold, and he is still going. The more I think, the less irritated I get, and realize what a good example he is. There are a lot of things in life I take for granted!

Are you tired of reading yet? I'm practically just getting started...

The other day as we were wrapping some gifts, he picked up a game that had a picture of a boy playing said game on the back of the box. He looked at me and asked, 'This game for white kids, mom?' Haha, WHAT? How the heck do you even know that the boy is white? Oh geez. Nope, that game is for all kids, buddy. Wow.

He insists on being a dog. Throw me a goggy snack, mom! Mom, I want you to put my seral (cereal) on the floor so I can eat like a gog. Look, mom, I'm a gog. I'm being really funny, mom. Other favorite phrases of Boston include: You got be kiddin me! What the heck? You are crazy. Ellie, you can not. (Ellie CAN NOT do a lot of things...touch Boston, touch his toys, his juice, his food, etc) Mom, my freakin pants are driving me nuts.(He can't get the button on his jeans snapped after going potty. It 'drives him nuts') Yes SIR! (He calls me sir...i guess i run a tight ship around here!) Welcome lady! (I have no idea where this came from. He'll randomly say it to me and then cracks up for the next ten minutes. I don't get it....) HAPPY BOY! (he yells this when he is in time out and decides he's ready to be happy again) My absolute favorite phrase is when I tuck him in at night after an hour of negotiating. He'll say, "What about hugs and kisses?" After a big squeeze-my-guts-out-hug, and a slobbery kiss, I tell him I love him, and he says, I love you too, mom, have a good night mom. After every mistake I make during the day, at least at the end of it, I know he still loves me. I guess no matter how bad it gets, I can know that the good times out-weigh the bad. Bring on the Three-nager!
(You want to know what he is currently doing as I finish? He is standing half naked with the toilet brush and is banging it on the side of the shower yelling, Drums! Drums! Drums!)